3.31.2013

What I Believe

Just thought I'd post a little something for everyone this Resurrection Sunday.



I believe in God the Father almighty 
Maker of Heaven and Maker of Earth 
And in Jesus Christ 
His only begotten Son, our Lord 
He was conceived by the Holy Spirit 
Born of the virgin Mary 
Suffered under Pontius Pilate 
He was crucified and dead and buried 

CHORUS: 
And I believe what I believe 
Is what makes me what I am 
I did not make it, no it is making me 
It is the very truth of God and not 
The invention of any man 

I believe that He who suffered 
Was crucified, buried, and dead 
He descended into hell and 
On the third day, rose again 
He ascended into Heaven where 
He sits at God's mighty right hand 
I believe that He's returning to 
Judge the quick and the dead 
Of the sons of men 

CHORUS 

I believe it, I believe it 
I believe it 
I believe it, I believe it 

I believe in God the Father almighty 
Maker of Heaven and Maker of Earth 
And in Jesus Christ His only begotten Son, 
Our Lord 
I believe in the Holy Spirit 
One Holy Church, the communion of Saints 
The forgiveness of sin 
I believe in the resurrection 
I believe in a life that never ends 

CHORUS 

I believe it, I believe 
I believe it, I believe 
I believe it, I believe it


3.27.2013

Travel Tip #2-Communication

Our coordinator said to contact our cell phone provider to sign up for an international plan to use in Haiti. If that didn't work, we could ask someone on the plane if we could use their cell phone to contact our driver when we landed. 

Yikes, that sounded a little bit out of my comfort zone.

When I stopped by the Verizon store, the very nice young man working said that if it were him, he would just pick up a pay as you go phone when he got to Haiti.

Still stressed out. 

I decided to look online to see if there would be any way to get a phone ahead of time. After a lot of reading online, I decided the way to go would be to purchase an unlocked international cell phone. Then all I had to do was get a sim card and purchase some minutes once I arrived in Haiti.

Thankfully, I knew that I could purchase the minutes and the sim card right at the airport when we landed.

I searched Amazon, and picked up a  very basic Unlocked 'Blu' Cell Phone.

It worked like a charm! The woman at the cell phone booth at the airport even put in the sim card and loaded the minutes for me.

All I had left to do was call the driver, using my very rusty French and we were set.


For communicating with home, we just brought an iPod, and used Skype and Facebook (they had wifi at the guesthouse where we stayed.)

Next travel tip-packing.


3.26.2013

Haiti Travel Tip #1-Know Where You're Going! :)



I planned our first trip to meet Baby B in a week. 

I knew I needed to pack light, which I could do, but I also knew that I was really nervous. 

 Our coordinator had told me that the Port au Prince airport was a bit like the wild west.

 I was bringing my seven year old there with me,. 

By myself.   

I decided to research online to find out the layout of the airport (if I could). Thankfully, I found this website.


 I printed it off to take it with me, reading over it several times to help me a bit with knowing what to expect. 

It really helped me to not feel quite so lost in the airport. 

Next tip, calling plans.


3.15.2013

What to expect when you meet your child

You've waited for months (or years). Finally the time has come to meet your child. 

What should you expect?

With Little Man, he was almost three years old when we met. He had been told that his mom was coming, and had about six months to be prepped for my arrival (along with Grandma). When I came, we played for awhile, then he took my hand and told me" lets go" gesturing to me which direction home was. Apparently, he had memorized the trip to Addis Ababa from the village, and he figured now that mom was here he would be able to escape the care center and head home. The agency I was working with had a policy that you would visit your child for three days, have one day to travel to meet any remaining birth family, and then your child would come to stay with you for the remainder of the trip until it was time to fly home. (At the time, Ethiopia was a one trip country.) Unfortunately, Little Man became increasingly upset with each visit I made, and then left him behind. By the time he could come stay with me forever, he was pretty ticked off and determined to not let me completely 'in' to his quality world. I was probably just going to leave again anyway.

 Those first days together, were hard. ('A jacket lady...are you kidding me?')


 Four months after I brought Little Man home, he asked me why I had left him in Ethiopia and went to America without him. It broke my heart (still does) and so we had our first conversation about his birth family.

Baby B turned nineteen months this week. From all of the information we have received about her, she has been called a very mellow, contented little baby. When she first entered the orphanage, she was one of two babies there, and they have doted on her. She does not easily let people into her quality world. She has her favorite nannies at the orphanage, and doesn't really like to hang out with the other nannies if she can choose. Some adults she has decided that she just doesn't like. According to what they had told me, the only words she really said were 'no' and 'mine' which is pretty typical for her age.




 Except, by the afternoon of our first day together, she was already saying 'thank you' in English. By day two, she was saying 'yeah' (unfortunately we have the bad habit of saying yeah instead of yes around here...possibly a result of my Scandinavian heritage). When anyone else tried to talk to Baby B, she would turn away and come running to me. As long as we were playing alone, just the three of us, she was jabbering non-stop, directing us where to sit, which toys were hers, giggling, smiling, doing silly 'jokes'. She adores her big brother (they had told me that she loved playing with big kids) and wants to copy everything he does. She loves playing hide and seek, having her tummy tickled, and singing the ABC song to herself while she looks at the ABC book with her brother (Little Man was the first one to read it to her, so she figured that he should read it every time!) When she is feeling shy or upset about something, she becomes completely still and tries to just go to sleep to escape who or what is scaring her.

 She loves to snuggle and hates car rides, but still ran to get back into the van with me when it was time for me to leave her back at the orphanage. My heart is still breaking.

When I became a mom to Little Man I remember feeling amazed and terrified that I was not just babysitting this beautiful boy. He was my son. It was up to me to raise him, to support him in his life to become the man God meant for him to be (not a mini me). Yikes. 

Holding Baby B in my arms putting her to sleep, I again felt those feelings.


 A baby?! A girl?! People have told me repeatedly in the adoption process that the married couples usually get all of the babies and usually request girls. I was okay with toddler boys. After all I already had one and he's great.

I looked over at Little Man trying to fall asleep while I sang to his little sister and prayed that I would be enough for both of them. That I would be able to focus fully on both of their needs and not let myself get too busy with one (or the other) but give both of them what they need.

So here I sit, with only one of my children.

It makes no sense to me that I would have to leave my child behind after we finally were able to be together. The Haitian courts now say she is my daughter. She should be able to come home now. I pray that this time away will not damage the bond that we have begun. When I return, I want to see her face light up in recognition as she runs into my arms.

Will your child(ren) immediately attach to you? Maybe, maybe not. I am not an expert. For me, the fact that both of my children didn't automatically smother me with love was a sign that they were discerning in their attachment to others. Their trust was gained gradually. Did I, as a child, immediately jump into just anybody's arms when invited. Absolutely not. As long as they have someone they have attached to (which Little Man had, and it appears that Baby B does as well) then they should be able to attach in a healthy manner when they come home.

So, what will it be like meeting your child(ren) for the first time. 

Terrifying, exciting, heartbreaking, wonderful, confusing, exhausting, amazing.


Expect the unexpected. 

Treasure each moment. Lock them in your heart. Remember that your child (no matter what their age) is just as terrified/hopeful as you are (probably more so).  It is all worth it. Give yourselves time to become a family, and grow together.

Breathe, pray, and just be. 

3.14.2013

We're back!

We've officially been 'home' for a couple of hours from our initial trip to meet Baby B. We are exhausted, but so excited to have a new family member. She fits into our family perfectly, just like God planned it! :)

I had worried about whether or not she would like me. A content little girl, she also has her favorite nannies and I wasn't sure if I would be added to her favorite list very easily. I shouldn't have worried. By the end of our first day together, we were starting to see her precious little smiles, and hear her giggles for the first time.

I'm planning on posting a list of how I planned for our last minute trip, what I packed, things that I wish I had packed, etc.

But, I feel a little too tired to sum it up with much clarity at the moment.

I couldn't resist getting a new picture up of Baby B though (taken by Little Man). He's try to coax a smile outer of her...and succeeding.

I can't wait to go back to see that little smile again!