Beauty from Ashes

Much like the ferns that first spring up after a fire, adoption is new life springing from great loss.

Baby B is losing everything that is familiar to her. She will be losing her country, her cuisine, her creche (the only family she has ever known), her language.  Things will smell differently, the bed will feel different, the food, the trees,  and the people will be different. The natural rhythm of her day will change (Midwestern time flows at a different rate than Haitian time). 

Even the air smells different.

When I visit Haiti, it is a complete culture shock.  I spend most of my time reaching back into the far corners of my mind trying to remember my high school French so that I can communicate with those around me somewhat. Baby B will not have that luxury. She has no prior knowledge to access. Just as she is beginning to get a good grasp on her birth language and being able to communicate her needs- we are taking that away from her. 

How do you explain to a two year old that it will all be okay? That you are there to take care of her. That she will grow to love her new family, and her new home? That soon she will understand her new 'normal'? That this time you will stay forever?

 You hold your breath and tread lightly. You move slowly. You carefully dole out all of your stored up affection in little bits. You cry with her when she grieves a loss that she can't yet understand. You laugh together at the little things. You celebrate little successes. You give her room, but stay close. You run whenever she calls. You waltz together in that dance called becoming a family.

 To say that I am excited about the idea of my little girl coming home within the next couple of months would be an understatement. We are so close now. I am so happy that my girl will soon be home. I can hardly wait to shower her with love, and to be her mom. Little Man has a whole list of things that he wants to teach his baby sister. We are going to have so much fun together! 

But it's important for me not to forget all that she's come from, because that also will be with her throughout her life. 

My precious little Baby B. 

3 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.

Isaiah 61:3

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Gentlemen (and Women) Start Your Engines!

The school year is starting, I have a crazy schedule for the new year, and my baby is still not home. Just when I had reached the absolute bottom in the waiting game (emotional, and mentally) I received an email that changed everything.

We have been cleared through another office, and things are looking good. 

Baby B should be home before the snow flies.

The wild ride is nearly over.

There are still a few hurdles to clear. I have to calculate how many weeks of time off I can afford. I'm praying that I will be able to stay home for at least ten to twelve weeks. I know it will be important for her to have that amount of time with me to feel that I am really mom and that I am not leaving her forever when I go back to work. I need to get all of my sub plans ready for the time I will be gone (A little know teacher secret: We plan all of the lessons even when we are gone for an extended amount of time and we grade the work that's done while we are gone as well.)

I am praying that when we do go to pick her up, she will still be open to accepting us into her little heart as family.

For my children's safety I won't be putting our exact travel dates when we do go(for obvious reasons). But it's getting really close now. Within the next couple of months.

Anyone want to join me in doing a happy dance?!

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Just B...

...Up

Do you ever get tired of running into those 'bumps' in the road of life? I do. If I had it my way, I would have everything go my way, all the time. 

Who wouldn't?

But, the fact is, I know me. The times I that I have had the most real personal growth in life has been the hard times.  

One of those nasty little bumps in the road has appeared again on my life's highway. I will spare you the details but will sum it up in one word-yuck. So, I'm bracing myself for the journey, and keep looking up (or ahead) adjusting my 'driving' accordingly. 

 It's kind of like travelling down the scenic byways instead of the interstate.

I always hate the rough spots, but once I'm past them, I know that I will love the view.

 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose. ~Romans 8:28

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Freebie Friday!

By now, I think you all know how I feel about simplicity. :)  

It appears that my pal Leonardo felt the same way. Enjoy the freebie.

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Winding up, winding down.

I adore summer and we've had a busy one.  In fact, I think we did more 'stuff'' as a family this summer than we have ever done before.

We moved forgotten flower beds...

ate yummy summer treats,

fished,

and fished,

and fished,

ate more yummy food,

caught amphibians,

caught more amphibians,

grew things,

and made lots of memories.

Sadly, summer vacation is winding down. Today, I spent part of my day getting my classroom ready for the school year. Next week, the other nine months of our year will begin (school, sigh). I love my job, but I always feel a bit sad at the end of the summer.

Hope you all had as much fun this summer as we did!

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Just B...

...Impulsive (sort-of)

So, I sometimes resist change. Quite often, I am comfortable with the status quo. The unknown can freak me out. However, I have learned or rather, am learning that it is worth it to do the impulsive thing once in a while. 

Let me explain. 

Have you ever had the urge to compliment someone on how they looked and resisted giving the compliment? I know I have.

I used to feel weird about giving out those compliments. But, one day I decided I was being silly. What have I got to lose? Will someone get mad at me for giving them a compliment about how they look? 

How about if I tell them they are doing their work well?  

Will they complain when I help them by putting away their grocery cart?

What if I pick up some garbage as I walk down the road-without anyone asking me to?

How about if I buy a meal for that person, instead of just giving her money so she can buy a 'pop'?

There a million little things that a person can do to make the world a little bit better place. I think it's a good thing for Little Man and Baby B to see me caring about the world around me, without having any expectations to 'get' anything back in return.

Little things.

Some people may think it an odd, but I am going to try to be a little more 'impulsive' from now on.

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Freebie Friday!

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